Recipe for “Childhood Fun”
- Bathing suit
- Lawn chair
- Rain coat
- Garden hose attached to spigot
- Sprinkler of some kind
- Optional younger sibling if not “allergic” to them.
Set Weather to: A brilliant blue sky with the sun baking from high above. A few puffy white clouds may be included.
Temperature: Recommend 80 to 90 degrees, with the humidity pushing it over 100.
Step 1 – Gain permission to turn on the water: A vital step to avoid the phrases “grounding”, “you are in so much trouble young lady” and “do you know how much our water bill costs” from your parents.
Step 2 – Dress in bathing suit and lug aforementioned ingredients from various regions of the house and garage. Forget the sunscreen.
Step 3 – Pile items onto concrete patio behind your house. Try to avoid the soft blades of vivid green grass if at all possible and remain on the scalding surface.
Step 4 – Remove rusty spray nozzle from end of the hose and drop it in perfectly logical location – where naturally your parents will never find it again. Then carefully screw on the sprinkler to the end of the hose before you turn on the water.
Step 5 – Nearly scrap entire plan because of unwanted ingredient. The air suddenly reeks of sewage – the tiny treatment plant across the road experiencing technical difficulties again. Remain steadfast in commitment to embrace summer and filter out the stench.
Step 6 – Time to add water. Turn on faucet from around the corner of house before sprinting back to the patio, racing the water as it shoots through the sprinkler.
Step 7 – Tease the water. Begin by running beneath through the gap of the waterfall, so the spray only grazes you.
Step 8 – Commence soaking. Add in jumps over of the sprinkler, blending it with a few strategic poundings over the powerful fountain.
Step 9 – Time to bake in hot Iowa sun. Unfold lawn chair onto the patio in the line of the sprinkler’s fire. Pull on raincoat over soaked bathing suit then open umbrella. Recline on lounge chair under this protective gear as the sprinkler bastes you in the heat. Pretend you’re a trapped mermaid longing for the sea as your tail flops on the chair.
Step 10 – Continue to baste and cook until bored or until your parents open the back door, asking “Why are you watering the patio and not the yard?” and “Why are using a raincoat and my good umbrella?”
Step 11 – Remove from heat, taking care to not drip over recently mopped tile.
Step 12 – Let twenty years pass then lament how your parents never took a photo of how ridiculous you looked to include with the recipe.
The Red Dress Club – This week, we’re giving you a photo to take you back in time.
In 700 or fewer words, show us where your memory takes you.
Remember that this image is merely inspiration. Your piece needn’t have a hose in your piece, but we need to easily see how you were inspired by it.
Once again, I tried something different. Did you like it? Hate it?